The Mental Psychology of Negotiating
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When negotiating, your state of mind is your greatest asset. Losing at anything will cause your state of mind to come under attack. If you can maintain a positive outlook on life, when life is not as favorable as you think it should be, in time, life will become that which you expect of it. If you’ve ‘won’ in life, when you’re down, recreate the scenario by which you won before and soon you’ll be a winner in your mind, again.
When you perceive that a negotiation is starting to go bad, don’t panic. Panicking will only exasperate the situation. During these times, stay cool. Call a timeout, if that’s what’s needed, and don’t start the negotiation again until you’re in a different, more positive, frame of mind. Before you sit down at the negotiation table, determine what winning the negotiation really means. Usually, winning is a testament to achieving a goal you’ve set for the negotiation. There will be times that you won’t be able to achieve the perceived goals, and yet, you can still come out a winner. You have to look for the unexpected opportunities that come up in any negotiation, in order to avail yourself to the opportunities such circumstance offers. In essence, you have to keep an open mind in order to open your mind.
The point the matter, it’s all in your mind. When negotiating, it’s a mental thing. Thus, if you can perceive a negotiation as a loss, you can perceive it as a win. I’m not suggesting you suspend reality. We all want to live in the ‘real world’, but what does that really mean? I’m suggesting you view an outcome that could be perceived as a negative situation and view the good that can be had from the outcome. If the outcome was not all that you expected, inspect the value you got from it. Sometimes the best lessons you can learn in life are the ones that comes from negative experiences. If you know your inner mental makeup and you pay attention to how you’re motivated by it, you’ll know if you’re motivated more strongly by negative occurrences or those that you perceive as more positive. We’d all like to be on top of the world, but there are lessons and benefits to be had as the result of being on the bottom sometimes. Sometimes you have to ‘go down’ in order to ‘go up’.
There’s always unbridled prosperity awaiting you, if you know where to look, when to look, and how to look, for that prosperity. After all, what is success? It’s defined by each and every one of us, differently. No matter if you’re at the negotiation table, or doing anything in life, you can perceive success on your own terms. Just remember, in negotiation and in life, it’s all about your mind and the mental perception you possess. During your negotiation, change your perception and you change the negotiation and your life … and everything will be right with the world.
The Negotiation Lessons are …
When you negotiate, watch to the degree you buy-in to the other negotiator’s position, at the expense of your own. A fine line has to be created between giving the other negotiator what she needs balanced against your wants.
In a negotiation, know your mental state of mind at all times. Also make sure you control your state of mind, so as not to give too much insight into the thoughts you’re harboring.
When planning a negotiation session, consult with those you feel can lend real bono fide input into the process. Don’t think you have all the answers to all the questions. By consulting those you trust, you’ll gain additional insight into areas you may have overlooked.
Greg Williams - The Master Negotiator
http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com
http://www.YourEmergingSmallBusiness.com
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