Assertiveness and Outside Influences
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When in a negotiation situation, outside influences could markedly affect your ability to be assertive.
Such outside influences might include:
1. The influence of authority figures
Such as a superior - this person could either advise you, or add pressure on you
A member of the law - such a person could protect you if physically threatened
A medical person - could offer advice and be authorized as a result of her/his professional standing to take medical action
There are others of course
2. Rules/Regulations within the workplace
Work guidelines - for example, anti-bullying, anti-harassment, workplace health and safety
If such guidelines do not exist, why not? How can they be created? Does each working hierarchy have representation?
3. External Rules/Regulations
Equal opportunity legislation and agencies
Industry ombudsman or watchdog
These are just some of the obvious ones
Here are some fun activities to do to cement your ever-increasing assertive behaviour:
1. Ask to share a taxi with a stranger on a rainy day (Make sure it is safe)
2. Challenge a queue jumper
3. If you have a right to collect something, and the person says, it is not ready. Make them aware that a phone call would have saved you a long trip for nothing
4. Challenge a smoker when you see it is affecting you and people around you
Remember that being assertive has nothing to do with ‘pushing your weight around’, and behaving like a bully.
It is simply letting another person know how you feel, how the situation is affecting you, and doing it in a polite, courteous, respectful manner.
The other person is only thinking about how what they are doing is best for them, and more than likely, does not realize the effect that what s/he is doing is having on you and others around them.
It is simply a matter of having inner self-esteem and building outer confidence.
But how do you build confidence?
You deliberately
- take small, manageable risks daily with either person or activities
- do or say assertive things you would not normally include in your repertoire of daily living, both personally or professionally.
Apply these activities in situations where the person is not a key player in your life, such as your boss.
What you are trying to do is to increasingly get out of your comfort zone.
Enjoy these experiences, see their value and you will improve in your assertive behaviors.
Gloria M Hamilten is a recognized authority in disciplines within Personal Development and People Skills for Business Professionals, such as Time Management, Negotiation Skills, Developing High-Performance Teams, Assertion Skills, Building International Rapport, Conflict Management and Resolution, Presentation and Platform Skills.
Her studies in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Psychology have lead to her researching brain disorders such as ADD and its relations.
She has her own training business, and conducts courses for Corporate Organizations, Sporting groups and Tertiary Educational Institutions in Australia.
Her professional experience covers over 30 years of study, research, one-on-one coaching, group coaching, presentations and workshops. Her clientele includes children as well as adults.
Gloria Hamilten has authored the eBook: “Practical Self-Hypnosis for Success” and many Reports and online articles.
Her websites provide a wealth of informative articles and resources on everything within these genres.
Visit her websites:
http://www.connect4results.com
http://neuro-linguistic-pro-site.com
This article may be freely reprinted or distributed in its entirety in any ezine, newsletter, or website. The author’s name, bio and website links must remain intact and be included with every reproduction.
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