Easy Negotiation Techniques

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Ever wanted to know how to bypass a person’s defensiveness?

Would you like to have a quick and easy way to not have to deal with a person arguing against you?

Yes? Good.

It’d be great to bypass this dirty aspect of everyday life because we’re certain to face the ugly face of defensiveness sooner than later.

Sometime during your day today, you’ll probably need this skill. This skill is a golden key so that you can sneak through a hidden psychological door in a person’s defensive behavior.

Firstly, what is defensive behavior?

It includes a mental shield that blocks you out. It can be:

- resentment

- bitterness

- secret sabotaging

- gossip

- blaming

Defensive behavior often comes from some sought of conflict.

It can be conflict within a person himself that causes him to already be suspicious of you before you
even say a word. When facing this person, you haven’t yet opened your mouth and you’re already facing an uphill battle.
The more common origin of defensiveness is conflict from interacting with another person.

In conflict, we seek to prove the other person wrong (a very bad choice). When we hear someone trying to disprove our point of view, their words are in conflict with our reality.
To protect ourselves, we become defensive! Defensiveness is used to protect our thoughts and feelings, as much as it is a tactic in sports and war.

You should learn skills to overcome a person’s defensiveness, but were aren’t looking at that today.
The simple method I’m about to share with you is away of skipping defensiveness altogether.
The method involves imagery.

Words make people defensiveness. They are used in arguments. Boring words can be a poor verbal communication skill.

If I tell you to stop annoying a coworker and that you’re behaving immaturely, you are only left to defend yourself. You’ll use statements like:
“I wasn’t behaving immaturely.”
“He deserved it.”
“Fine.” - You comply, resent me, and later continue the behavior.
Bitterness, conflict, and resentment arises from the use of bland words as it makes people raise their shields.
On the other hand, the visual is more concrete than words.

What makes imagery very persuasive is its ability to establish unity. You get people to see an image AND experience the exact feelings and thoughts YOU want them to experience.
Yes, imagery will have different interpretations. But strategic imagery can be controlled to evoke the thoughts and feelings you desire in the person you are talking with.
There are rarely two-sides to strategic symbols and imagery - just one shared understanding.

In this coworker situation, let’s say you don’t have time to listen to the problem. It’s small and you need to solve it now. (If you did have the time, you’d probably be better off to understand the problem in case there are deeper issues going on.)
Use imagery and symbolism to persuade the annoying coworker.

(I just looked at a quote near my desk to come up with this statement. It’s from Alexander Graham Bell.)
You could tell the person “I need that report finished. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.” No one can argue against that.
The annoying coworker knows he or she needs to stop annoying people because of unproductive work which may lead to a poor performance evaluation.

Continuing with a nature theme, you could say, “The gradual dripping of water on cement may seem harmless. Though, overtime, continual water drops destroy the cement.” No one can argue against that.
The annoying coworker knows his or her behavior is eating away at the person being annoyed and that there will likely be long-term consequences.
You totally skip a person’s defensive radar.

One last example I’ll provide is using a symbol. Depending on the work the two are doing, they could be given a specific title for the project which implies their togetherness. The togetherness isn’t created from the actual title, but the two actually sharing a title.
This makes symbolism a great way to strengthen team cohesion. You can create and distribute items that establish an “us verse them” mentality. Hence, a reason for team uniforms.

It isn’t about trying to be all zen-like. It is about creating imagery and symbols instead of boring words.
Your creativity makes this method endless. You can win people to your way of thinking, skip defensive behaviors, and make friends by using the power of imagery.

Joshua Uebergang writes a free newsletter on effective communication skills, which you can sign-up to today by clicking here. In it you’ll learn how to win people over to your way of thinking while making friends. Kill two birds with one stone! To develop more negotiation skills, you can discover more effective techniques and negotiation strategies at his blog.

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